Lessons From Lockdown

This is more of a reflective post than anything else. I invite you to reflect with me- I wonder if you’ve had some of the same musings and discoveries as you've adjusted back to our new normal after extended lockdowns.

1. The Value of Freedom to Choose

I am certainly not about to get into any debate about mask wearing, lockdowns, mandatory vaccinations or any other contentious issues. It seems that the moment we are not ‘allowed’ to do something we suddenly crave it and when we are forced to do something it no longer becomes appealing. I love a day at home but suddenly being forced to be home made me want to be anywhere but home. Most children I work with love using devices for learning- but as online learning dragged on they were desperate to to use pen and paper- anything they could manipulate with their typed out fingers. Throughout lockdowns, isolations and the like it has been clear that being forced to behave in a certain way challenges our desire for freedom. Particularly in cultures where we value the individual more than collectivism.

2. Different Realities

The fact is lockdowns are a very different reality for everyone. Some children and adults alike have loved the opportunity to learn in isolation without the complications of human relationships and the social anxieties that can arise.

Others have suffered in ways that is plain to see- losing their ability to work, move freely to see family or play sports and other activities that benefit their mental health.

And then there are those who have suffered quietly, behind closed doors. Strained relationships between partners, abusive relationships between parents, children and between siblings. Many of these people have suffered in silence with no one to turn to. One way to manage this is to be gentle with everyone as anyone could have been in any of these terrible situations.

3. Relationships Matter Most

What we miss most during lockdown gives us a really good idea of what we value most. It seems clear to me that what many have missed more than anything is the connection with others. Whether it is the workplace banter and laughter that simultaneously gets us through the work day and increases our feeling of belonging. Or the chit chat with our dear friends over a meal where so much more can be shared and understood than through non contact connection.

Or the social connection between children at school, which as much as it may lead to complications and at times challenges it is always teaching our children how to exist in our complex social society. Relationships and the value and feedback they give us matter so much and lockdown put a real strain on our relationships with those we were with 24/7 and those we could not be with.

4. Our Children Are Amazing

There is no question that the children missed out on so many enriching parts of their lives during extended lockdown but most of them are okay and if anything they developed resilience.

So many children I know developed tech skills far beyond most adults in their lives and they are suitably confident contacting teachers and finding or even making resources online.

Alongside their budding confidence online our children's ability to be self directed should also be celebrated. So often children are over timetabled- not only throughout the day at school but also with before and after school activities as well as weekend sports and social lives. Lockdown gave children a chance to be self directed in their work and play- a freedom some may have never experienced before.

Of course sometimes they were self directed to play more than work but then focussing and limiting distractions are skills many adults are still developing.

Overall I hope we can all look back and be proud of the growth and development we all had during lockdown- sometimes having to dig deep to stay emotionally regulated at challenging times but also often getting lost in the flow of free choice and creativity.