The Value of Family Meals

As parents there are so many variables that contribute to the wellbeing of our children that it can be tempting to look for a quick fix. What if I told you that there was a quick fix that has been linked to increased academic gains, resilience and self-esteem in children?

Research has found that the simple act of eating meals as a family has been linked to improved mental and physical well-being for all family members, in particular the children. Some studies have even found that sharing family meals reduces the risk of teen pregnancy, substance abuse and eating disorders.

Some scientists argue that there are other reasons the families who share meals regularly see these increases in physical and mental health. Either way, here is my take on why sharing family meals increases the well being of family members.

Social Connection

Positive psychologists have found that the number one way to increase our happiness is to ensure we engage in genuine social connections. There is no doubt that a family meal free of distraction is an opportunity for true connection. These days our lives are so busy that family meals might be the only time we sit down to chat and check in with each other. In our family, mealtimes often become a frenzy of silliness and laughter as the older girls entertain the babies. Sometimes I feel the need to quieten everyone down and restore order but then I stop myself and take the opportunity to witness the relationships between the children blossom.

Being Present

Most of our day we are busy; busy with work outside the home or the seemingly endless tasks in the home and if we are not busy we are often distracted. Meal times are an opportunity to both stop the tasks that keep us busy and to switch off from distractions. Being truly present and mindful allows us to engage positively with our family and to truly enjoy the meal before us. Mindful living and in particular, mindful eating is considered to reduce stress and encourage healthy eating habits.

Healthy Habits

The physical health benefits of meals prepared at home is undisputed in the scientific research. Not only is food prepared in the home likely to be healthier than alternative meals such as take-away and restaurant meals but adults also get the opportunity to model healthy and culturally appropriate eating habits. Furthermore, it has been found that those who eat their meals while watching television are not only more likely to eat more food but they are also more likely to eat higher calorie foods. Just another reason to sit down to family meals free of distractions.

Getting the Most out of Family Meals

Despite the widely recognised benefits of eating meals as a family there has been a sharp decline in the number of meals families eat together since the 1960s. Some barriers that families have to overcome include scheduling conflicts, distractions from technology and fraught family relationships.

However all of these can be overcome if the family meal is a valued and protected ritual in your home. Here are some of my ideas for getting the most out of family meals;

• choose a time that suits the majority of family members. Dinner won’t suit all families, perhaps everyone is home for breakfast in your home? Also note that it is okay if not every family member is available for every meal. If two family members are eating and connecting it is absolutely still worth going ahead with the meal.

• turn off/put away devices (having the children choose the music can be a nice touch). For all family members to truly be present, distractions need to be reduced.

• everyone helps- from choosing the food (ideally in advance), helping to prepare, setting the table and clearing up; involve everyone. Meals are much more enjoyable for everyone when they are not the responsibility of one family member.

• Move away from allowing meal times to become a power struggle. If children do not want to eat or engage for whatever reason remember that the benefits are still there for those who do engage.

There are even more wonderful ideas for getting the most out of family meals including recipes and conversation starters at www.thedinnerproject.org

Photo by Jimmy Dean on Unsplash